Tell your joke here

[Kart]

Two pirates walk into a bar,
the third one ducks.

[DezNutz]

Two pirates walk into a bar,
the third one ducks.

The fourth one blows it away with a barrage of cannon fire, killing the two idiots that walked into it.

[Meliva]

a 70 year old man goes to Social Security with his lawyer to discuss his payments, the Social worker says they believe he is earning money aside from his payments ask how he affords so many nice things. he responds, I'm a gambler, which wouldn't qualify as a job. to prove it I bet 5K I can bite my own eye. the social worker thinks for a moment and agrees to the bet. man takes out his glass eye and bites it. he says I bet 10K I can bite my other eye. social worker thinks for a moment, realizes he's not blind so his other eye is real and agrees, man takes out his false teeth and uses it to bite his other eye, the man then says I bet 20K I can stand on one side of your desk, and piss straight to the trash can on the other side without getting a drop in between. man agrees knowing he couldn't possibly do this, the old man ends up pissing all over the guys desk. the guy is happy he finally won the bet and won 5k when he realizes the mans lawyer looks upset, he asks him what's wrong the lawyer replies" he made a bet with me for 500k that he could piss all over your desk and you'd be happy."

[Bigtea47]

Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?
Because they can spend years at C!

[Meliva]

why couldn't the kids watch the pirate movie?
because it was rated ARRRRRR

[DezNutz]

Why did the pirate get slapped on his first date?

He grabbed her chest and tried to steal her booty.

[not a pirate]

"Why are all pirate jokes so cheesy?

THEY JUST ARRRR!"

still
correct
to
this
very
day

[Bmw]

a 70 year old man goes to Social Security with his lawyer to discuss his payments, the Social worker says they believe he is earning money aside from his payments ask how he affords so many nice things. he responds, I'm a gambler, which wouldn't qualify as a job. to prove it I bet 5K I can bite my own eye. the social worker thinks for a moment and agrees to the bet. man takes out his glass eye and bites it. he says I bet 10K I can bite my other eye. social worker thinks for a moment, realizes he's not blind so his other eye is real and agrees, man takes out his false teeth and uses it to bite his other eye, the man then says I bet 20K I can stand on one side of your desk, and piss straight to the trash can on the other side without getting a drop in between. man agrees knowing he couldn't possibly do this, the old man ends up pissing all over the guys desk. the guy is happy he finally won the bet and won 5k when he realizes the mans lawyer looks upset, he asks him what's wrong the lawyer replies" he made a bet with me for 500k that he could piss all over your desk and you'd be happy."

ive been laughing for over an hour from reading this

[Dreadnort]

what do you call a man with a shoval in his head dug ....what do you call a man with out a shoval in his head dugless.......what do you call a girl with one leg Ileen.....and all the other jokes that I know are not able to put here to many thin skins would get offended
great thread i'm really liking the topics that are on here...........that joke bout the social security is a scream........cheers for that...

[Grimrock Litless]

I tried to catch some fog, I mist.

How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it!