Dez, I would think that in this scenario, since both players must select attack for the main mechanics to kick in, both are at the same risk of loss.
Both players are agreeing even though it was initiated by one. If fleet make up is hidden like on the port gossip page, the initiator may be running into a hornets nest. Imagine running into one of Pheonixknight dragon fleets. Many players now are running escorted trade fleets as well. Some of those trade fleets are more stout than the war fleets I sail.
Make it more interesting and take the identifiers out of this mechanic. If you initiate a spotted proximity fleet, you may only be able to see the flag flying, not the name of the fleet, the Captain, or the fleet configuration.
That would make this interesting.
+1 Will