Uber-Legendary Mega Voodoo Card
Posted: Fri Feb 03, 2017 2:01 pmThe Uber-Legendary Mega Voodoo Card : Krakens Revenge - Part 3 : This time, it's personal!
Rarity : Unique
Recipe :
10 Bored Krakens
10 Voodoo Storms
3 Macrame needles, freshly sharpened
3 drops of Donkey's Tears, freshly distilled and clarified by being passed through Danik's underwear.
Cost to use : 1 turn
making time : 200 hours.
Duration : Permanent
The Kraken are bored, their eyes water from constant perusal of suggestion after suggestion : their brains are stupifyed by dull argument after dull argument : they are angry : they seek revenge for this waste of their precious time which could be better spent dragging unsuspecting sailors to their doom.
Once cast any suggestion for a new voodoo card which displeases the Mighty Kracken will result in the following Revenge :
The vile offender will be dragged from their home, their home shall be demolished, the land salted, their crops laid waste : their family sold into abject slavery, their pets sold for pointless medical research, their belongs crushed and used as landfill for public lavatories : the miscreant shall have their miserable brains extracted, liquidized and fed to hungry baby krackens : their skin shall be shaved form their rancid carcass and used to make drums for drunken beggars to beat loudly as warning to others : their voodoo chest shall be opened and scattered to the winds, their credits given to wastrels and waifs : their coin melted down and made into a great pointed stick upon which the remains of their corpse shall be impaled and thus displayed to the general populace.
Any dissent or objection to this mild-mannered proposal shall be met by the displeasure of the Kracken : you have been warned.
Rarity : Unique
Recipe :
10 Bored Krakens
10 Voodoo Storms
3 Macrame needles, freshly sharpened
3 drops of Donkey's Tears, freshly distilled and clarified by being passed through Danik's underwear.
Cost to use : 1 turn
making time : 200 hours.
Duration : Permanent
The Kraken are bored, their eyes water from constant perusal of suggestion after suggestion : their brains are stupifyed by dull argument after dull argument : they are angry : they seek revenge for this waste of their precious time which could be better spent dragging unsuspecting sailors to their doom.
Once cast any suggestion for a new voodoo card which displeases the Mighty Kracken will result in the following Revenge :
The vile offender will be dragged from their home, their home shall be demolished, the land salted, their crops laid waste : their family sold into abject slavery, their pets sold for pointless medical research, their belongs crushed and used as landfill for public lavatories : the miscreant shall have their miserable brains extracted, liquidized and fed to hungry baby krackens : their skin shall be shaved form their rancid carcass and used to make drums for drunken beggars to beat loudly as warning to others : their voodoo chest shall be opened and scattered to the winds, their credits given to wastrels and waifs : their coin melted down and made into a great pointed stick upon which the remains of their corpse shall be impaled and thus displayed to the general populace.
Any dissent or objection to this mild-mannered proposal shall be met by the displeasure of the Kracken : you have been warned.
