The rules are simple:
First, you take the wish above yours, and grant it, but add a terrible side-effect
Second, you make a wish yourself

Eg.
Granted, but ....

I wish...



So, let me start with,

I wish people would talk to me more...

Guluere wrote:I wish people would talk to me more...

Granted, but you will understand no known written or spoken language.

I wish for more mindless forum games.

Granted, but ever forum gets locked after the third post.

I wish Danik would let me say goodbye to Poncho one last time.

Granted, but Poncho will kick your teeth in as soon as you say your goodbyes.

I wish that l could have the biggest voodoo inventory ever.

Ferdinand wrote:Granted, but Poncho will kick your teeth in as soon as you say your goodbyes.

I wish that l could have the biggest voodoo inventory ever.

Granted,but it will be all pacifism.

I wish that I could have the Kraken as a pet.

Granted, but the Kraken defecates all the time, everywhere.

I wish I had infinite time with which to do things.

Rodney wrote:Granted, but the Kraken defecates all the time, everywhere.

I wish I had infinite time with which to do things.

Granted, but you are a paralyzed multiple-limb amputee in a coma.

I wish I had an infinite supply of beer.

Granted, but then you would get a fat belly.

I wish i had more love.

Granted,

but none of that love is good.

I wish I had a surprising amount of beans....

granted :

but Hannibal Lector arrives at your door with some fava beans... and a nice Chianti...

I wish peace love and understanding upon all Avonmora...