King of the Hill

[Alarabi]

Alarabi buys a taco from elwood and sits on a chair watching the fight for a hill.

[Xepshunall]

if yall dont stop this fight and take a lunch break then imma nuke you

The 1st son of Xepshunall orders two crispy and six soft and says, "I have to have something soft if I'm gonna try out that concrete throne". He takes four of the soft tacos and asks Elwood to keep the others warm for a friend. When he gets to the throne, he informs Trafalgar that Elwood has seen him clutching his belly and has some freebies for him. When Trafalgar goes running for the food, The 1st son of Xepshunall rolls on the ground laughing until he spies a cushion attached to the bottom of the throne with hook-and-loop fasteners. He moves it to the seat, sits down and enjoys his tacos very much, mostly because they are awesome and partially because, upon sitting, he hears a tune he remembers from a coronation he once saw on television. Curious as he was, he looks around and finds a little plastic box on the end of a cord with a dial on it and turns it to the point that indicates maximum. He raises up a little and sits back down. The tune plays so loud that nobody within a city block could miss hearing it.

[Xepshunall]

Where's Trafalgar? I thought he'd be back by now.

[Random pandah]

after crossing the river Styx in the opposite direction, staring down Hades, defeating Cerberus, and exiting the underworld completely, pandah bribes xepshunall's son who was corrupted by being king for so long. the chair has been bought!

[Xepshunall]

The 1st son of Xepshunall invested the gold he received from the bribe in a start-up merchant sailor who had good plans. The merchant paid back in full with interest very quickly. The interest was invested, even more wisely, in the relocation of an adult Eucalyptus tree which was planted 50 feet in front of the Concrete Throne. At a random time on a random day after a random number of attempts to resist, a Random pandah left the Concrete Throne to enjoy some fine dining on a random branch of a very specific tree that recently arrived. The 1st son of Xepshunall sits on the Concrete Throne, counts the gold to verify that he still has as much left over as Random pandah paid plus a few odd pieces of silver and contemplates how he might benefit from the next temporary "King of the Hill".

[Snowy McScruff]

Jonah bored of watching gets up from the moutain ands steals the few random pieces of silver that xepshunall had and buys a truck load of mud and a few potted plants. he first dumps the mud on the concrete hill burying the first son of xepshunall and then he plants the plants on hill and making a throne of nature and then he sits on it wondering what will happen next. Also wondering when xepshunall will get out from his mud prison?

[Xepshunall]

Xepshunall's 1st son, being the wise person that he is and having seen this mud mess coming a little too late to make a run for it, removed his shirt and plunged his head under the throne, placing his shirt as a shield to keep the mud from suffocating him. When the shock of the event passed, Xep's 1st son begins moving the mud from around his arms to the air pocket under the concrete throne, which was actually pretty large since there was a trap door that thankfully none of the conquerors noticed. It wasn't long before he was moving mud from around his torso and legs. When he could, he oriented himself upright and began digging upward and climbing on the new-fallen soil which was less moist than he had feared. It occurred to Xep's 1st son that he must have been knock unconscious by the weight of a truckload of mud and that he had been out long enough for the old soil to pull some of the moisture from the mud. When he reached daylight he realized he was hungry and a new fear struck him. Where is Elwood?! Xep's 1st son organized a search party as soon as he finished a leisurely meal (a man's gotta eat, after all). He finds Elwood pushing his taco cart at a run with Trafalgar chasing him, waving fists full of money. Don't ask me. I just tell it as I see it. Maybe Elwood is out of tacos and Trafalgar is being unreasonable about it. After all, they were the best tasting tacos ever.
Jonah was wise not to cause damage to the cemetery and the Gods blessed him for adding useful substance. It was spread throughout the family to avoid challenging the will of Jonah. May his reign be short and sweet.

[Adama]

*sneak behind jack and pull his feet until he fell and kicked him down the hill* " I am the TRUE King of the Hill"

[Xepshunall]

Jonah is the TRUE "King of the Hill" as of three post prior. Please try not to misdirect this post.

[Roileon]

Jonah is the TRUE "King of the Hill" as of three post prior. Please try not to misdirect this post.

Xep should get an award for actually being the winner for about 6 months give or take. Well until now, let's see how long I'm winning for. Turns out, in typical french style, i cowardly dug a tunnel under the hill and made a pastry shop selling pastries to the defeated warriors, 6 months later, I was out of dough and came out to see Xepshunall sitting on his throne. After going on strike (as common in my culture) Xepshunall left, and was crowned King once more