Bonjour, mes amis:

I gaze upon this thing called 'presents' but, quelle 'orribles, I 'ave no personages to exchange these gifts with, so, avec desolations de la extremal, I mourn each passing day and the loss of such fine voodoo curses as 'Light rain with passing clouds' which make your dread enemies umbrella to smell of cheese : what is to be done?

if some kind soul also feels such mournful 'orrors de couer, despachez les PM to moi, and we can find safe, loving 'omes for these otherwise lost curses and charms...

merci

D

i shall join you, my name is MOREA (all caps)